Just say it ..

Why do we meet if departing is the ultimate destiny of our meeting? What is the purpose of that is going around us if everything is going to end one day; this constantly keeps us in shadow of fear that we are going to lose people dear to us . We remain shocked & spell bound when it is sudden & unexpected. How are we supposed to deal with this? So many questions haunt my mind as I heard news of the sad demise of my close friend due to COVID-19 & the times we spent together went flashing in front of my eyes. Deep down the sadness in my heart refuses to accept the loss I suffer as he departs to his heavenly abode. If ‘end’ is the ultimate destiny, nobody can change, shouldn’t we remain detached and emotionless with persons dear to us & act out that detachment? I feel, if we do that, we tend to lose the essence of true bonding & relationship . As I see life so far, emotion is one flavor which is so integral to being human & so are our relationships with other human beings. In the era of artificial intelligence , this is one thing that will always have an edge over what supercomputers can do & it is a fun thing how much ever technological progress we do. So I think emotions plays role in our relationship of life like what salt plays in our food. In absence of this ingredient which is invisible to naked eye in otherwise perfect recipe makes food unpalatable . So to deal with these emotions, why not deal with them like we deal with salt. In a measured proportion . Presence - it should have but in the right proportion . So that you continue to have craving for curry forever. Too much of it spoils the curry you know. Time you enjoy with that measured saltiness each of dear ones impart to you depends on what your destiny has stored for you . Not less ... not more . Still I know it is easy to say but difficult to follow . Isn’t it ? At times, we certainly cannot control these emotions with people around us.. We tend to get involved so deeply as to bring us grief as they depart. Without they being there in our life, our life is feels like saltless food we eat & we regret their eternal absence for a life time . How can we make situation tolerable as when they are not around as emotions associated with them overwhelms us? Particularly if loss is sudden & unexpected. Probably the answer lies in expressing gratitude for their having been in our life. Within yourself time & again .. yes by letting them know when they are there around you without expectations of any reciprocation whatsoever since you enjoy such moments together before it is too late.Gratitude cannot certainly replace the loss you suffer as you lose them , but within you it makes that bearable to an extent . We often fail to express that because of our so called ego, hesitation of how that may person respond , how people around perceive that etc . But as long as you are not expecting any kind of reciprocation, I think you are absolutely fine to express it to yourself & person you have gratitude for what they add to you rather than being too late . By expressing that gratitude to that person in their presence , you carry no regret of not expressing to yourself & that person you are grieving in their absence . So friends , our time here always is measured & limited , enjoy your meal with presence of correct proportion of salt, acknowledge gratitude to it for being there in your meal .As someday ,you will find that salt missing in your meal with that missing someone .. but you will be able to accept it with grace. Happy feasting !

-Krantikumar R Rathod